Fear, Baldness, and Bad Combover Decisions

-- Created with help from Midjourney

Fear has an uncanny way of sneaking up on you. For me, it all started when I began losing my hair in 10th grade. My first fear? The "fear of appearance." Yep, I unlocked Level 1 of "What Will People Think of Me?" This wasn’t just any fear—it was a full-blown crisis. I tried everything, short of sticking grass on my head and calling it a day (honestly, that might’ve worked).

I was terrified of how people would see me. Would I still be considered "handsome" by society’s standards? Spoiler alert: Society’s standards are overrated. But that fear led to others. I became insecure, shy, and uncomfortable in my own skin. Baldness runs in my family—both sides, thanks, genetics!—so I shouldn’t have been surprised. Still, I clung to my remaining strands like they were the last french fries in a bag.

For nearly 15 years, I transformed from a confident, playful, and extroverted boy into a quiet shell of a man. That was until one day during my master’s program, I had an epiphany: “Who was I kidding with this combover?!” The jig was up. I decided to take back control, so I shaved it all off. Bye-bye hair, hello baldness!

And, naturally, this unlocked a new fear—"The Fear of Being Bald." (Great, just what I needed.) But after a year of nervously rubbing my head and pretending it wasn’t shiny, I realized something—baldness didn’t define me. I felt more confident, like I was finally reclaiming myself. No more hiding.

But just because I conquered one fear didn’t mean the rest disappeared like magic. Nope. As I grew older, more fears jumped into the picture: family responsibilities, societal expectations, finances, student loans (yikes), and so on. It was like fear was throwing a never-ending party, and I was the VIP guest.

Then Came COVID: The Ultimate Teacher

COVID taught me some lessons, too. It forced me to rethink what was really important in life. I faced health scares in my family, which brought on a whole new wave of fears. But here’s the kicker: I realized that fear only has power if you let it sit there, rent-free, in your mind. (Fear is a terrible tenant, by the way.)

Over the past few years, I’ve worked hard to bring those fears under control. One thing I learned from every self-help book and motivational speech is this: **Action** is the antidote to fear. You don’t need endless affirmations or expensive self-help gurus—you just need to take action.

Action is Karma, Baby!

Whenever I feel fear creeping in, I don’t sit and stew anymore. I get up and do something about it. (Usually, after a cup of coffee, though—I’m not a monster.) There’s no point in reminiscing about the past—it’s gone, like last week’s paycheck. We often suffer more in our minds than in reality.

Progress isn’t always obvious. It takes time, effort, and a lot of conscious decisions to face your deepest fears. It’s like driving your dream car—except the car is your life, and fear is that annoying backseat driver who won’t stop giving directions.

Final Thoughts: Live Boldly, Fearlessly, and Have Fun and most importantly TAKE ACTION!! No one is going to do it for you….

So here’s the deal: If you’ve got fears (and we all do), take action. Have a sounding board—whether that’s God, your spouse, your best friend, or even your dog. Define your goals and move forward. You are stronger than your fears, and life’s too short to be stuck in neutral.

I know this sounds easier said than done, but I’m learning right alongside you. Let’s live life in the driver’s seat, laugh along the way, and maybe, just maybe, stop worrying about the hair that’s long gone.

I’m rooting for you!